Four years ago, my world was rocked and righted at exactly the same moment. When I sat beside a small hospital waiting room table across from a surgeon who was wiping his brow and drinking diet coke from a tiny can while fidgeting with his phone; rocked and righted when he handed me a picture of what he had discovered.
Four years and oh so much and not much has changed at the same time. It actually amazes me that we are still pretty much the same. Thank God we are still pretty much the same. But I think it may actually be time for some change. Change that honors the experience. Change that says, “We learned from this. We were given another chance and we made good on it.” Change that says, “Nope. Not anymore.” Change that says, “Do something different. Do something more. Do something great. Don’t be stuck in the same place, doing the same thing, feeling the same way. Do something.”
Four years after looking in that mirror with a million questions and I am so thankful for this. Just this. Just all of this. I’m thankful for my mess. Thankful for my busy. Thankful for the chances that I have to do what I do and be who I am.
But there’s also the pull of honoring the opportunities just a little bit more. The draw of doing something because of this. The dream of breaking out and breaking down and breaking through. The raw, utter, inner need to make it happen.
I’m done writing the same things over and over in my journal. I’m done creating the same vision board again and again. I’m done with the matrix. It’s time to take the red pill or the blue pill once and for all. Leap. Jump. Change. Transform. Just freakin’ move from this spot.
One step at a time. One action at a time. Intentional in my actions and intentional in my inaction. Intentional in my thoughts and words. Checking in. Checking out. Checking with.
Life is too short and my life is too precious to not do any of these things. My time is too dear, too special, to valuable to waste on things that do not inspire. My world is too blessed to be withered away and just simply pass by.
Four years later, this morning I headed outside for some morning pages writing. Everyone that knows me knows that…I am not a fan of moths at all. As in, I kinda don’t like them so much that I might even use the word hate and I almost never use the word hate.
But this morning, four years later, I stepped outside and the first thing I saw was this moth. This huge, grubby moth, hanging out on the side of my house.
And for the first time, I was not grossed out by it. Instead, I was somewhat amazed by it. It really is pretty much a grub with wings. But. It. Has. Wings. WINGS! It can fly. It can defy gravity and flap and work hard enough to lift itself up off the ground. And FLY! Powered by its very own wings.
That, my friends is freakin’ amazing. There’s no sense in walking, crawling, dragging yourself across the ground or through life when you can fly. By your own strength. Fly! You don’t have to be perfect. You don’t have to be the prettiest or the brightest or the best. You don’t have to be a butterfly.
You can be that moth.
You just have to use what you’ve got and do the work and fly.
Engage each day with action words to make good things happen.
Let’s all, Go. Do that.